Tag Archives: calmness

Its Diwali But I Am Scared!



Its Diwali time here in India. A beautiful festival full of lights,food,sweets and loads of happiness .Everybody is happy. Dressed up in their finest clothes all are gearing up for the Lakshmi Puja in the evening. I am also happy , but…

¬†….But I am also so scared.

Will it last…peace, happiness,contentment.

Maybe I am a pessimist or I am God fearing. I don’t know, but whenever I have too much of a good time I silently start saying my prayers. No illness for a long time, no money crunch, no fights at home,a perfect family vacation, children doing well in their lives, weight under control. Oh the ¬†list is endless. Things that are taken for granted by many, but for me my whole world revolves around them. I feel blessed if I sleep well for a week. I am on top of the world if my blog gets a lot of likes. I go berserk with happiness, If my family is free of ill health and all are sitting eating together.

It was 35 years back that I had my dad,mom,and my dog with me while celebrating Diwali. Those were happy times. I was young , a child and had no responsibilities. Now I am the mom, the elder of the family, but I am happy. But deep down there is a lurking sense of fear.

Am I losing my mind or do I really need to be scared. For as they say , whatever goes up comes down. Is this going to happen to me also? Gives me the jitters. Help me god. The constancy of change scares me.

Or do all people think like that?

No time to contemplate now….have to go…

So ,will come back late at night or tomorrow, to share my Diwali with you.

You all will be there?

Please be, I told you I love constancy in life.

Till then!

Waiting to be fearless and happy.